Happy hiatus over. I have spent May to October in my all by myself apartment, healthy, making headway on bills and living five to fifteen minutes away from some awesome regular pediatric patients.
Now change has shook my life up again and I have a roommate.I am moving back to the far east valley and my living expenses are doubling just as my patient hours therefore income are cut.
So what did I do this time to deal with my very interesting life? I went to a game convention and had fun. Phoenix and my divorce from the broken gamer boy marked a real break for me with the whole comic/game/geek culture as far as cons, gatherings and large public gatherings, well except for Renaissance Faire. First real game con in ten years. really went to support a friend who is on the staff. I had a truly good time, although I kept running up against my reflected ego too often to be comfortable. My huge ego and self involvement irritate me.
New project: figure out what next. Still alive again, obviously. In debt. Not well enough to pull off school and work right now. No romance and no desire or need for one. Friendships changing. Move, change job maybe again? Really life? And now the Faire cast upheavals. Great time to breathe......
Sunday, October 10, 2010
Saturday, May 1, 2010
Monday, February 1, 2010
Here comes the Brid.
http://www.unicorngarden.com/brigid.htm
This is my favorite link on the internet to the stories of Brid/ St Bridget. Probably because I believe St. Bridget was actually Bird's spirit in a modern Christian incarnation. I also believe Brid is the soul of the Lady of Guadalupe and Quan Yin. I believe she appears in an incarnation that can do the most good for her time and her people and that all of them are the same loving Goddess who will not leave us behind until all have found peace. She is my patron saint/goddess/boddivista and each year I make commitments too her, and to myself on Imbolc. The light returning, I am cleaning my house now for tonight. I will light my new candles from the one burning since yesterday and welcome her into my home and hearth. So although tomorrow is Groundhog's day to some, I love that in reality they are just living through the early story of Imbolc.
Of interest to me for its coincidence is how the Wolf Moon is a moon in my sign of Leo, since I am more lunar oriented and Brid is my patron Goddess. Now on to day one of 365 days to a better Me,
February 1: Task Clean Common portions of the House and begin weekly commitment to clean house, floors, dust and all each Monday,
How it has gone so far...Ignored my alarm and got up two hours later than I planned, then Half-assed my morning Druid Rosary
Cleaned living room. entryway, and hallway before turning on phone, computer or eating.
Showered.
For brunch I ate 1 organic free range egg with chopped green onions, a summer squash and organic mushrooms mixed it and made myself a latte with organic 2% milk and organic free trade coffee.
Probably should have done the soy per my stomach. LOL.
Spent nothing yet today.
Watched one Castle episode on DVD during brunch.
Worked out menus for two week-ends with Kathy the stage manager for Mayor's Court, spoke to GEICO on insurance for December car accident, talked to staffing for my new patient assignment.
Have just spent about two hours on-line. Better get back to the plan or it ain't finishing before sunset!
This is my favorite link on the internet to the stories of Brid/ St Bridget. Probably because I believe St. Bridget was actually Bird's spirit in a modern Christian incarnation. I also believe Brid is the soul of the Lady of Guadalupe and Quan Yin. I believe she appears in an incarnation that can do the most good for her time and her people and that all of them are the same loving Goddess who will not leave us behind until all have found peace. She is my patron saint/goddess/boddivista and each year I make commitments too her, and to myself on Imbolc. The light returning, I am cleaning my house now for tonight. I will light my new candles from the one burning since yesterday and welcome her into my home and hearth. So although tomorrow is Groundhog's day to some, I love that in reality they are just living through the early story of Imbolc.
Of interest to me for its coincidence is how the Wolf Moon is a moon in my sign of Leo, since I am more lunar oriented and Brid is my patron Goddess. Now on to day one of 365 days to a better Me,
February 1: Task Clean Common portions of the House and begin weekly commitment to clean house, floors, dust and all each Monday,
How it has gone so far...Ignored my alarm and got up two hours later than I planned, then Half-assed my morning Druid Rosary
Cleaned living room. entryway, and hallway before turning on phone, computer or eating.
Showered.
For brunch I ate 1 organic free range egg with chopped green onions, a summer squash and organic mushrooms mixed it and made myself a latte with organic 2% milk and organic free trade coffee.
Probably should have done the soy per my stomach. LOL.
Spent nothing yet today.
Watched one Castle episode on DVD during brunch.
Worked out menus for two week-ends with Kathy the stage manager for Mayor's Court, spoke to GEICO on insurance for December car accident, talked to staffing for my new patient assignment.
Have just spent about two hours on-line. Better get back to the plan or it ain't finishing before sunset!
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
Beginning anew
So today is a new day, and I try again.
365 days of dating (I want to quit after two dates) instead of the old style pirate booty and run or hibernation
365 days of eating right for me that means primarily vegetarian, organic and restricted "whites" meaning wheat flour, sugar and milk products.
365 days of exerciseing my body, mind and spirit.
365 days of a balanced checkbook.
And 365 days of blogging about it all.
In an effort to make myself over into the friend I want for myself.
Today is a work day so the blog is short. Of the above - my checking account has not been overdrawn for 13 days, I have meditated daily for 7 days, read and/or done mental exercises for 7 days, have actually exercised half of the last seven days, and have steered away from donuts yet succumbed to salty goodness and a s'more at work.
As to the dating...well moe on that tomorrow.
Namaste and good-night.
365 days of dating (I want to quit after two dates) instead of the old style pirate booty and run or hibernation
365 days of eating right for me that means primarily vegetarian, organic and restricted "whites" meaning wheat flour, sugar and milk products.
365 days of exerciseing my body, mind and spirit.
365 days of a balanced checkbook.
And 365 days of blogging about it all.
In an effort to make myself over into the friend I want for myself.
Today is a work day so the blog is short. Of the above - my checking account has not been overdrawn for 13 days, I have meditated daily for 7 days, read and/or done mental exercises for 7 days, have actually exercised half of the last seven days, and have steered away from donuts yet succumbed to salty goodness and a s'more at work.
As to the dating...well moe on that tomorrow.
Namaste and good-night.
Saturday, January 9, 2010
Day 9 of 365 days to a better me
So I am trying to just be.
So little is devloping as I think it should.
What I am grateful for today:
My children are alive and healthy and so is Noeine my dog.
I have use of all my limbs and faculties.
I have a roof over my head and clothing and certainly more than enough food to eat.
I have ahorse to love and pet where I live.
I have friends who care about me and support me even when I make stupid decisions and cheer me on when I make good ones.
I am having an unexpected staycation this week-end. Much needed too!
I have a job.
I have marketable skills as a nurse and a writer.
The dessert is always different daily and always beautiful.
OK. So on the dietary front of improvement I have to actually eat some dinner when I get home. Not hungry today really. I had one glass of fresh squeezed grapefruit juice this morning and espresso with probably a cup and a half total .soymilk plus two teaspoons of cinnamon sugar. That is all to eat, no exercise today really either. Did my laundry today, although it needs finishing when I return home from this little library/computer break.
Which leads to my dating escapades. so I joined a dating site and committed to myself that I would at least go on three dates before washing my hands of relationship attempts this year.
My first date was a gentleman who is my age, although he looks a bit more worn around the edges. A literate man, actually wrote reviews for the Library Journal at one point, designed a role playing game (more solitaire than group oriented) that has been around for 30 years t least, like classical music and can talk art. We went to see the new Robert Downey Jr movie, Sherlock Holmes as a steampunk action hero bromance that was well worth the ticket price. And he was a gentleman, buying my ticket and a drink for me. So far awesome potential if with every geeks awkwardness as to how to actually approach things like holding my hand, etc. The date kind of tanked though for me on the technicality that he lives with his wife and sone. Yup, not ex-wife but wife and obviously needed to get home for dinner as he began watch checking as our date came to a close. Oh well,
Number two has yet to happen but will certainly blog about it for what it is worth. So many people talking, blogging, etc. The din of self-confession on these cyberways is overwhelming.
A post on Soul Pancake asks what is the change I am being,,,If I am to be the change I want to see first task would be to determine what it is I want to see.
That is one of the distinct problems of living beyond ones assigned expiration datte....so I beat the cancer, now what? If I am to go on and live for another decade or three, who do I want to be, what do I want the world I live in to look like?
I feel a collage session coming on.....
So little is devloping as I think it should.
What I am grateful for today:
My children are alive and healthy and so is Noeine my dog.
I have use of all my limbs and faculties.
I have a roof over my head and clothing and certainly more than enough food to eat.
I have ahorse to love and pet where I live.
I have friends who care about me and support me even when I make stupid decisions and cheer me on when I make good ones.
I am having an unexpected staycation this week-end. Much needed too!
I have a job.
I have marketable skills as a nurse and a writer.
The dessert is always different daily and always beautiful.
OK. So on the dietary front of improvement I have to actually eat some dinner when I get home. Not hungry today really. I had one glass of fresh squeezed grapefruit juice this morning and espresso with probably a cup and a half total .soymilk plus two teaspoons of cinnamon sugar. That is all to eat, no exercise today really either. Did my laundry today, although it needs finishing when I return home from this little library/computer break.
Which leads to my dating escapades. so I joined a dating site and committed to myself that I would at least go on three dates before washing my hands of relationship attempts this year.
My first date was a gentleman who is my age, although he looks a bit more worn around the edges. A literate man, actually wrote reviews for the Library Journal at one point, designed a role playing game (more solitaire than group oriented) that has been around for 30 years t least, like classical music and can talk art. We went to see the new Robert Downey Jr movie, Sherlock Holmes as a steampunk action hero bromance that was well worth the ticket price. And he was a gentleman, buying my ticket and a drink for me. So far awesome potential if with every geeks awkwardness as to how to actually approach things like holding my hand, etc. The date kind of tanked though for me on the technicality that he lives with his wife and sone. Yup, not ex-wife but wife and obviously needed to get home for dinner as he began watch checking as our date came to a close. Oh well,
Number two has yet to happen but will certainly blog about it for what it is worth. So many people talking, blogging, etc. The din of self-confession on these cyberways is overwhelming.
A post on Soul Pancake asks what is the change I am being,,,If I am to be the change I want to see first task would be to determine what it is I want to see.
That is one of the distinct problems of living beyond ones assigned expiration datte....so I beat the cancer, now what? If I am to go on and live for another decade or three, who do I want to be, what do I want the world I live in to look like?
I feel a collage session coming on.....
Monday, January 4, 2010
January 3 2010
Three days till it really starts.
Over all Plan, same as everyone else in America, just five days later. Get out of debt, improve my physical condition, and strengthen those spiritual muscles.
Concrete goals.
1. Really have no debt by Jan 6, 2011 may include an actual savings balance
2. Have completed a full marathon, learned to ride a bike and started swimming lessons may include a weight loss of up to 100 pounds.
3. Not as easy. Will think some more on this one, but now I sleep for the night.
Over all Plan, same as everyone else in America, just five days later. Get out of debt, improve my physical condition, and strengthen those spiritual muscles.
Concrete goals.
1. Really have no debt by Jan 6, 2011 may include an actual savings balance
2. Have completed a full marathon, learned to ride a bike and started swimming lessons may include a weight loss of up to 100 pounds.
3. Not as easy. Will think some more on this one, but now I sleep for the night.
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